Here we go again....

by **ScouseFitz** » 05 Jul 2015 06:29

Well, it's been a long, hard two years since we last journeyed up that hill away from Icmeler, on our way back to Dalaman after another wonderful holiday. But two years is a long time, and enough is enough. There's sun to be sought, cold Efes to be consumed, Adana kebabs to be munched on, and, most importantly, the Three Bells needs me! Not only that, but it's been left to me to import some Marks and Spencer undies for JT! No Emporio Primani for him, oh no! Only the most ridiculously overpriced will do!

So, it's 7.44 Sunday morning, and at midnight, we'll be arriving at Sun Village to enjoy another laughter packed family holiday under Turkish skies. We're keen to see the much discussed changes, try out new places for food, and there may even be a trip to Marmaris on the cards for our eldest's 21st birthday meal. Special times ahead, and we couldn't be more excited. Oh, and of course, there's a blog to be done too.......it's good to be back!

We're busy doing nothing, working the whole day through, trying to find lots of things not to do'

Don't worry, JT, I haven't forgotten the blog, I've just been busy. Doing nothing. Let's go back to Sunday, and start from there, then, eh?

Sunday.

Looking back on it now, I should've known. Should've spotted the signs. But I was so relieved to have finally escaped the clutches of the Meet and Greet parking at Manchester airport, my mind was elsewhere. Meet and Greet? Meet and Wait more like. I dunno what the hold up was, and I didn't really care, I just wanted to go on holiday. The wait was probably only 5 minutes or so, but at the end of a long, hard two years without a holiday, it was 5 mins longer than I was happy to put up with. They've introduced a new facility there, where you drive into a tent while they take a load of photos of your vehicle. A selfie of your car, basically. So, after our C-Max has posed and pouted through its photo session, someone finally lets us through to park.

We grab our bags, throw the car key at the poor man in the office, who seems at his wits end with this new 'system', and leg it towards departures. We've already checked in online, cos we're really organised, see. Or at least, Mrs ScouseFitz is. She's got it all boxed off, boarding cards, visas, insurance, you name it. Me? All I had to do was turn up, really. I'd been so busy with work that I hadn't even had time to buy any clothes! None of my 'holiday wardrobe' fits me – we'll come back to that. So, we're in 'bag drop'. Another queue. And we're told that check-in is actually half an hour early. Wow!. We make the obvious assumption that that means we'll arrive on our holidays half an hour early, right? Right? Speak up, I can't hear you?? Well, no. That's not what it means, it turns out. We fly through departures, security, into Duty Free, where The Bank Of Dad is subjected to what feels like an organised raid by two members of my family, buy some magazines, where, I have to say, we face the longest queue of all at the WH Smith self serve counter. (I'm gonna write to them when I get home to advise them of my radical new idea. I know of a machine which will serve the customer, take the customers money, and even speak to the customer! The name of this radical new machine? Humans! Why not employ humans? That'd be a great idea.) Off to the bar.

As we look out of the windows in the bar area, the skies darken, and the heavens open. It's torrential ou there. Any minute now, I expect to see jet planes and suitcases floating past the window and being washed away! It really is VERY wet out there. Another Guinness please, barman. Ha! Brilliant! Nothing better than leaving the UK for warmer climes, and leaving bad weather behind. So, after a couple of pints of Guinness, priced at just under a fiver a pint (bargain knock down rates!), we head off to the gate, and we're running a tad late. When we get there, however, we find that we're not the only ones running a tad late, cos the plane hasn't even arrived!!! Hmmm. Could it be that they knew this when we were at bag drop, I begin to wonder. Hurry up and wait. So, years later, the bloody plane arrives, people get off, they refuel, take the bags off, clean it, etc etc. Then, still in the rain, we're finally allowed to board and we're ON OUR WAY!!!

Except. We're not. Because we've missed our slot, and the weather's so bad that they don't want to give us a new slot. So again, we wait. On the packed and hot plane, on the Tarmac. On several occasions the Captain, who at this point probably has EasyJet HQ on his back, desperate to avoid having to pay us all compensation, keeps telling us, just another 15 minutes, just another 15 minutes…..

The natives are getting restless, the parents are getting agitated, and the smokers?? Well, they're planning a mutiny...they're gonna 'get off and have a smoke'….oh dear. Meanwhile, JT is at home in Turkey watching Skyscanner, phoning and texting me to tell me the rules on claiming our money back. This could be interesting…. We take off, two hours late, and head for Dalaman, on a 'different route' to avoid following the storm...yeah ok….whatever.

It's ok though, the bars open, and that lovely little trolley keeps on rolling by, packed to the hilt, so the natives, it seems become a little less restless, and eventually fall asleep. At one point, my snoring is scaring the small children around me (and some of the adults), but Mrs SF has the solution, and leans across the aisle to smack me awake with a rolled up copy of Take A Break. Wow. That's some weapon, my arm's still hurting!

Off the plane, two and a half hours late, avoiding any chance of a refund, but finally, we're here. At last. Out into the car park, and its then, right at that moment, when it becomes real. After the longest wait, and the worst delays, the lack of comfort, we're here. The crickets welcome us with their chorus from the trees, it's warm, you can even smell the heat, practically touch it. Immediately, my shoulders, tightened by the stress of everyday life, start to drop, to relax. Its a magical feeling, and one I'll never tire of. Lovely. Just lovely. Like I said, it's good to be back…...

by **TurnerFamily** » 09 Jul 2015 07:36

Great to read ScouseFitz a refreshing change from all these Icmeler Facebook wars! Have a great holiday

by **shelly** » 09 Jul 2015 07:54

Great blogging as always , great read . And a big thankyou for giving us your time while on your long awaited holiday with your family .

Think you got off very lightly in duty free ... :lol:

by **ScouseFitz** » 09 Jul 2015 08:32

Monday. A day of rest. Lots and lots of rest.

And so, we arrived via our extremely comfortable and speedy private transfer, at Sun Village, soewhere around 3am Monday morning. We're met by Jamie, who seems like a nice guy, and he shows us to our apartment on the 2nd floor. We're exhausted but happy, and we drop onto the beds and sofa bed like dying flies. I smile to myself at the thought of having nothing to for the next two weeks but do nothing, and drift off. ZZZZZZZZZZZ……

I'm up first and straight onto the balcony. I'm happy to see that the mountains are still there (tho quite where else I was expecting them to be, is anyone's guess!). I make a brew and sit to take it all in, while the family snooze on. Where to go today? What to do? Well, the answer turns out to be not much at all. I've brought a library's worth of reading material to plough through, and my intention is to give it a good go, so after a balcony breakfast of goods which Mr Marks and Spencer-Undies has arranged to be left in our fridge (thanks Michelle!), we head downstairs and take up residency at the far end of the pool. The silence, the peace, is deafening. Only the birds for company, and they seem happy to see us as they sing to us all day long. It's in and out of the pool, on and off the sunbed for a few hours. Its all very demanding and exhausting stuff, and of course, its thirsty work too! So, having seen another guest have what looks to be the coldest beer available under Turkish skies, it in for a penny. The first ice cold Efes of our holiday. And boy, it's good, the cold condensation drips off the glass and freezes my arm as it runs away. Heaven. Right there. In a glass. It's the simple things, eh?

The mind is curious, the eyes want to see the changes that we've heard so much about, the feet are itching to get out and stroll, there's no shortage of good intentions. The heart and the spirit are strong. But the body? The body just shrugs, throws its arms up in the air and says 'No thanks, mate, I'm not moving of this here sunbed', and once again, I drift off into a deep sleep in the sun. Its as lovely as it is well earned. All four of us just lie around all afternoon taking all this in, swim, snooze, swim, snooze etc etc…..

Eventually, we head up to get changed, and after a G and T on the balcony, its off for something to eat. A brief straw poll around the family, and Hanedan is the winner. Its off for an Adanna, some grilled liver, and Ahmet's hilarious Scouse accent, which has our 14 year old in fits and howls of laughter. Another customer has a complaint, which is dealt with swiftly and professionally by Team Hanedan, and as this customers plate is taken away, he produces an iPad to show his wife the photos he's seen on Trip Advisor of what the food should look like!! It takes all sorts, I suppose…

As we're about to leave, Hanedan is 'graced' with the presence of a couple of very rude, obnoxious, and extremely loud, demanding customers who shout at the staff as though they're stupid or have never met a rude Englishman before. It's a sad spectacle for someone who works in this industry to witness, I feel for the staff, and wish them look as we walk off. Another lovely meal. As we stroll back to Sun Village, we're already discussing what to do tomorrow, and where we'll eat. The others mention somewhere called The Three Bells???

Me? I've never heard of the place…….

Tuesday. People to see, places to go.

Well after stoking the engine last night at Hanedan, I'm feeling energetic and decide to do some strolling today, so I dive out of bed, cram some coffee, orange juice, eggs and toast down me, and its off around the old village for a walk. I take my time, weaving around the back streets, have a nose at the Mosque, say hello to the locals as they go about their day. I stop by and admire some of the vegetable patches. A far cry from my allotment back home, where I grow a selection of some of the loveliest weeds known to man. Other plot holders envy my weeds, and the ease with which I grow them. I just tell them it takes no effort. Literally. And anyway, they're not weeds, they're just plants in the wrong place!

I meander back down the hill to Sun Village to find the family sprawled out like a gang of cats, in the midday sun, and the youngest agrees to accompany me on a little walk around to say hello to a few friends. First stop, Jimmy Asda to change some money. I walk in behind him and surprise him. After the hugs and handshakes, he steps back, takes a look at me, and says “My God, what happened, Brother? You look like you're seven months pregnant. With twins!!”

Let me explain just why my old 'holiday wardrobe' doesn't fit me any more. When we were last here in 2013, staying at the Rhodes apartments, I declared that when we got home, I would stop smoking. None of my family believed me, nor my friends when I got home. Why would they? I'd smoked since the age of 12, I was a passionate and committed smoker. I could smoke for England. I loved it. I didn't care who knew it...love me, love my ciggies, that was how it was, and had been for 35 years. Anyway. I did it. Went home, saw the doctor, got some tablets, no patches, no e-cigs, no Allen Carr books, no gum. I just took a few pills, had a couple of bad dreams, and it was over. Done. I haven't smoked since, and its two years next month.

BUT…….and it's a BIG but…

I smoked my last ciggie on August 28th and I was 12 stone, as I had been since the age of 16. By Christmas Day, I was 16 stone!!! 4 stone in 4 months! A stone per month! So, yeah, it's true, you're taste buds certainly do come back!! And yes, I needed something to do with my fingers. So I ate. And ate. And ate, and I've been trying to lose some of it ever since. But its lead to some humour among my family and friends, including Jimmy Asda, who said the only thing he would sell me now is salad! Tolga in Rhodes...”Wow, you go big man”. Ahmet in Hanedan “A man without a belly, is like house without balcony” That one was a compliment. I think. I hope.

In the run up to this holiday, friends and family alike have asked if I'd bought some speedos so that I could dance around the pool….

They were comparing me to this guy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPhXZQFBeEE

Ridiculous! I'm a much better dancer!! Though I can see the resemblance.

The best one I've heard so far though, came as I got into the pool the other day, and was kindly, and loudly delivered by my charming and unhelpful 14 year old daughter, who simply shouted “TSUNAMIIIIIIII”. Nice. The people around the pool seemed to approve of her sense of humour….as they ran for their lives to escape the oncoming water!

So yeah, I've put a little weight on, and there will be more fat man jokes to come, no doubt.

So, after my hilarious encounter with Jimmy, it's back to base for lunch. Cheesy chips for the girls. Salad for me. Then a quick flood-free dip in the pool, and I'm off for a shave to the barbers near the three bells. This time I had a steam shave, where they shave you twice, the second time with jets of steam forced into your face. It was fantastic, and highly recommended. And now I've come up with another handy use for my Black and Decker wallpaper stripper. I'm a creature of habit, of course, so I stop in next door at the Three Bells, where I bump into Smiler “Oh my God, look, big balcony”!!, have a quick one with the guys, and then head back to Sun Village, for one at the bar with Jamie, followed by a G and T, and we're off back to the Bells, for some delicious Korean wonder. As ever, it was fantastic. I had my usual, Bi Bam Bap, which, though it sounds like the name of a Eurovision song, is actually a hot and spicy beef stir fry, with veg, lettuce and fried egg. The good lady had some kind of chicken noodles which she said was fantastic too, and the daughters both had spicy prawn noodle soup. All good, and always is. If you haven't already tried it, you should. Now we're all a little worn out, so its a slow stroll back, and an early night. I'm exhausted from all the walking, and laughing at the countless fat jokes, and I'm desperate to finish Book number 1, so with Jim Beam's help, I do a few chapters, and climb, ever so carefully, unsure if its strong enough to take the weight, onto the sofa bed.

by **ScouseFitz** » 10 Jul 2015 07:29

Wednesday. Watch the sunrise.

Awake at what I think is an early hour, I peak out of the curtains to see a grey sky and its dark. Eh? That can't be right. Step out on the balcony to find that the suns not up yet, so I make a brew, and sit facing the town and beach, and the sun begins to rise over the mountains. From the second floor at Sun Village, the sunrise is directly in your eyeline, and its just beautiful. I put this song on in my headphones, one of my favourites,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_G4rBCsLwSs

and sit there with a satisfied grin that doesn't budge all day. Its a lovely experience, and the sort of thing I've been wishing for in the past two years while we've been waiting for the chance to have a holiday. Beautiful, happy, sundrenched days with my family. It really doesn't get much better.

Nobody's around, except the birds and the chickens. And of course, the bakers. So I take a walk down to the bakery behind Tansas to collect a couple of still warm loaves. The smell is incredible. You can't beat the smell of freshly baked bread. People flock from all around for their daily supply, and I head off for a walk along the beach before anyone's awake. At least that's what I thought. The beachfront path is actually quite busy with joggers, power walkers and a vast array of other exercising lunatics. The sort of people who think regular exercise is good for you. Looking at them, some of them must have got up even earlier than me to manage to squeeze into that lycra. That surely must've been enough exercise just managing to get it on! It was also good to see that business is still booming in the budgie smuggling world. Along with excessive vodka drinking and giving people lethal injections with the end of an umbrella, this is something the Russians excel at.

As I double back along the front, I stop and talk to one of the waiters from the Kontes Beach, whos just setting up for breakfast. He invites me in for a coffee, and I watch the sun climb to its peak as he brings me an ice cold freshly squeezed orange juice. The heat's rising, and I'm still smiling, so I decide to head back, taking in the side streets and back streets around the beach, and go in search of Selam which is a restaurant we've never tried. At the top of the street, I discover the remains of what was the Red Lion. Boarded up and derelict. I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry about its demise. I don't think it'll be missed.

As I've been wandering, I have noticed a few of the Mayor's changes, much talked about on the many Icmeler sites, and forums. I have to say though, I think the places looks tidier, neater and a little less chaotic. The shops have their outside space limited, so they can't encroach too much into the road. Some of the outdoor roofs have been replaced with electronic retractable awnings, the water bottle Christmas tree outside the Three Bells is also a victim of these changes. People's opinions differ, but other than a smarter appearance all round, I can't complain. Back to bas with my loaves, and a Turkish breakfast banquet on the balcony, before the Mrs and I go out for another walk. We make our way to Cafe Del Mar. She's never been and I want to show her the view. It's 11.22 when we sit down, and after a brief unspoken conversation, we decide that no, its not to early for a beer, so we sit with an ice cold Efes, watching the lunatic paragliders for a while. Sorry, you'd never get me up in one of them. I prefer Terra Firma. The more firma, the less bloody terra!!

Back to base for an afternoon's sun worship, while I reach the final furlong of book number 1, and after a couple of late afternoon beers, beck upstairs to get changed for tonight's culinary treat, courtesy of Sidik's. Nice to see the family again, and we managed to get our order in just before a party of 33 people turned up to eat, practically filling the place. That was close! Its a massive family, all on holiday together. From our table, we can look across the road and see how well Tipsi is doing, people come and go all night, the place is heaving. One to try, and one that our youngest, who is obsessed with all things American related, insists we're trying tomorrow. Fair enough. After another lovely meal at Sidik's, where we filled ourselves with grilled meatballs and salad (again! - I'll be turning into a rabbit at this rate), we all decide that an evening wander is called for and head off for a little beach action. As we pass Cupid's, I'm pleased to see our old friend from Charlie's, Mehmet, working there. He invites us in for a drink on the house. Rude not to, really, and we chat for ages. It's great to catch up with him, and my eldest has spotted her all time favourite word on their menu. Nando's. Looks like we'll be heading back to Cupid's before we go home, then!

We head home for a nightcap, and just as we settle down. BOOM! Power cut. Jamie hits the emergency lights in the bar, someone shouts “does this mean the till's not working?”, and we wait and wait. Eventually, someone puts 50p in the meter, and Icmeler comes back to light, and life. Except our room. These things only happen to me. After much tutting, some huffing and a good amount of puffing, my frustrations are relieved when my daughter informs me that I hadn't put the key fob in the slot properly. I mumble something stupid to myself in attempt at defending my inadequacy, and sit down with Mr Jim Beam to round off book number 1. Done. Jobs a goodun.

Tomorrow, we get our motor running, and head out on the highway, looking for adventure, or whatever comes our way……..

Here we go again....

Here we go again....

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